Warning…I’ve sprayed a LOT of carpet cleaner in the past few minutes (dirty dog+light carpet=bad idea) which has resulted in my eyes simultaneously spewing water and feeling like they are on fire AND it’s possible that I’m high on fumes. That said…I may be a rambling idiot right now. Read at your own risk.
When I was little I was lucky enough to go to Disney a few times. One particular time, my Mom was hosting winners of a radio contest on a trip to Disney, and we were to fly from Minneapolis in a…wait for it…Disney. Plane. A little Disney Plane that had a TV and VCR and every Disney movie ever made. I was so excited I wanted to die. So when a ridiculous blizzard hit Minneapolis, as you can imagine, I was a tad dismayed. Our trip was delayed a couple of days and I nearly went mad. I couldn’t sleep nor could I understand why it mattered that there was a ton of snow when we were taking a plane. Of course we eventually made it on the little plane and to Disney and had a great time.
I rarely have that feeling as an adult. When my anticipation and excitement for something are so great that I can barely sleep. I’ll admit, Christmas still holds that power for me, and every Christmas Eve I drift in and out of dreams of luggage, or Apple electronics, or jewelry, or Santa. Other than Christmas, however, there isn’t much that is so exciting that I get butterflies in my stomach, am giddy, and am unable to sleep.
Today shouldn’t have been an exception. On paper, today was less than a perfect day. What with a stupid amount of work to get done, the second trip to the vet in three weeks, I’m sorry what I actually meant was the second EXPENSIVE trip to the vet in three weeks, dinner and homework with the little girls, and a book fair and ice cream social at the little girls’ school. A pretty standard Wednesday.
The (expensive) dog and I started on our walk and I realized two things. A for one, I was NOT feeling a long walk tonight. Not. At. All. B for two, I haven’t tanned in weeks. WEEKS I TELL YOU. I’ve been spray tanning since last fall because in winter? My skin tone resembles that of a corpse. Spray tanning makes it possible for me to go throughout my day without worry that people will think I’m very very sick. The past few weeks have been crazy, plus it’s been nice and warm out, so it’s seemed weird to go spray tan. And so, my skin has returned to its pale sickly color, which has not helped my mood.
You can go ahead and shake your head at my vanity but the awesome thing about my vanity is that it’s mine. So there.
I decided to walk the circle once, instead of twice or three times as usual, so I could get home and go tan. There are logistics involved with spray tanning. You can’t get wet for four hours, you can’t really sweat for that time, and until you shower you smell a little. But tonight it worked. The tricky part was that the dog still needed good exercise. So against my better judgement, but in the name of tanning, I ran. I ran that dog around our neighborhood circle so fast that he would get worn out before he knew what hit him. And it worked.
Sore but energized, I basically threw him in the house, and took off before my husband had a chance to question why the walk had taken so little time. I tanned and rushed home in time to read the next chapter in our Nancy Drew book and as the girls were getting ready for bed my husband asked how tanning was and I realized something big.
Me: Holy sh-t!
Me: Holy sh-t! Tomorrow I’m going to wake up tan and Friday I’m going to wake up tan AND blonde. HOLY SH-T IT’S LIKE I’VE WON THE LOTTERY!!!
Husband: Umm…yeah. Just like.
(For the record my little girls were NOT in listening distance of this conversation.)
It’s true. My blonde hair is back as of tomorrow night. When you go from naturally light blonde to brown, and then realize that you seriously made the wrong choice, you can’t just turn around and go back to that light blonde you’ve enjoyed since the beginning of time. You have to wait. If you don’t your hair will start on fire and probably all fall out. Or something like that. Bottom line is that I’ve had to wait a very long time to safely go back to blonde. But the day is here people. Well, no, tomorrow the day is here.
And tonight when I realized that? It felt like I was hopping aboard the tiny Disney plan tomorrow morning with nothing to do but watch Bambi and 101 Dalmatians until I got to Disneyland. I was suddenly energized and excited and there is a very good chance that sleep won’t come easily tonight. I’m so excited I could die.
I’ll be honest…it’s kind of nice to have butterflies and be full of glee…even if it is only because a tan and blonde hair are in my near future. And what a relief it is to be old enough not to care that it may sound completely shallow and ridiculous.
TODAY: What if I can still get excited like I did when I was a kid? And furthermore, what if I try to do that more often?
PS – I admit that new handbags also get me this excited…so when I said that Christmas was the only time I really felt this way I was lying…it’s really Christmas AND on the eve of a day when I’ll get a new handbag. Which isn’t often and doesn’t come cheap.