MAMACADABRA

As I scroll through the pictures of “feet-by-beach/pool” selfies, faces that look a little too red (because lord knows us Minnesotans don’t see sun for a good nine months of the year), the spires of the Magic Kingdom looming above the overly excited faces of their children, sunsets, water, green grass…it’s almost like all of my “friends” are trying to imply that their Spring Break is better than mine.

I mean…we’re only expecting 5-10 inches of snow between today and tomorrow.  Big deal.  I can handle another snowstorm (pay no mind to the tick I’ve developed since learning of this impending snowstorm).  I don’t need no stinking sun (pay no mind to the fluorescent color of my skin).  I certainly do not need to relax (yes…I KNOW I have a huge permanent furrow between my brows).  I’m fine just where I am.

Just.  Effing.  Fine.

The little girls are on Spring Break this week.  Every single one of their friends, except for one each, is somewhere warm and lovely.  In places where earmuffs, gloves, and parkas are not necessary when out for a walk.  It’s just a teensy bit infuriating.  We kicked off our b-tchin’ Spring Break week by arranging not one, but two sleepovers this past weekend.  It was nice outside for like a second, so they even got to pull out their electric scooters and zoom around without risk of frostbite.  Sunday night the little girls and I went out for dinner and then wandered through the aisles of Barnes & Noble.  We love to do that when we have time and are jonesin’ for new books (which is basically all the time these days).  We sat down to read the back of books to decide what we wanted.  We looked for authors we love.  We ordered a book that wasn’t in stock.  And we finally decided on one new book each.  From there?  Dairy Queen.

Spring Break was looking good so far.

My Spring Break consisted of staying home with the little girls on Tuesday.  And let me tell all of you sun kissed lucky ducks…we totally lived it up.

First we went to pick up the two friends who, like us, are here in sunny Minnesota this week.  We ran a load of food to the food shelf and then went to a lovely little cafe for lunch.  I always like to find fun little restaurants in the places I visit!  After enjoying our lunch, with every other schmuck stuck in winter wonderland, we moved on to our afternoon entertainment.

I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for The Muppets.  We made our way to the local theater to catch a matinee and to eat our weight in movie treats.  After two hours of giggling, slurping, chewing, and all around merriment, we headed back to the villa we’ve been staying in.

The little girls and their friends went straight to their rooms to play dress up while I cleaned the kitchen.  Soon came a request to wear my heels.  Which was promptly followed by little girls clomping around the house, fake cell phones to their ears, barking “I’m going to a meeting, can you meet me at the gym?”  The little girls were eagerly followed by Sullivan the dog as well as his buddy Stanley who we’re babysitting this week (his family is on Spring Break of all things!).

I finished my cleaning and decided that there really was no other activity that screamed Spring Break like poop scooping an entire winter’s worth of dog poop.  I moved outside, as did the kids, and they were joined by some boys down the street who were also, miraculously, in town.  The scootered, dodged dog poop as the ran around the yard, climbed trees, and took the season’s first ride on the tire swing.  While I didn’t get any color, other than my ears turning red from cold, it was so nice to be outside and not cooped up in the house villa.

When the little girls’ friends were picked up, we and the boys down the street took our dogs for a long walk, down jackets and all.  As we walked, and the little girls chatted away like crazy, and the boys circled us on their bikes, and the dogs pranced over puddles and snow piles, I was able to take-in what a nice weekend and day we’d had.  No homework, no spelling words, no meetings, no work calls, just a nice little break.  Even if it was a staycation.

In a month the little girls will fly on an airplane for the first time and head to Disney with their other family.  In two months, my husband and I will be flying off to Vegas.  There are wonderful trips in all of our futures…for which I am so very grateful.  As I continue to seethe with jealousy over the FB beach shots I will hold tight because soon enough, when everyone else is back from their vacations and back into the grind, we will be the ones posting vacation pictures.

68 days until I fly away from this grey abyss of snow.  Not that I’m counting.

TODAY:  What if a b-tchin’ Spring Break is all in the way you think about it?