Our. Little. Secret.

So about Cousin A (she’s left a couple comments on this blog).  She actually IS my cousin…it’s not just a clever name.  She and I go back…well since we were babies…but for most of our lives we’ve lived thousands of miles apart.  Not convenient for cousins who truly adore each other…as we do…but we make it work.  Over the past 15 years she has come home for some holidays, and I’ve been to visit her on both coasts, and in between we just miss each other terribly.  We’ve had to support each other through thick and thin over the phone and via email.  Whether it’s been crazy roommate situations, boyfriends, raising kids, etc., we have been each other’s biggest cheerleaders.

From the beginning we’ve been…how should I put this…fairly certain that we are destined for greatness.  I’m not entirely sure what that means but we’ve known it for a long time.  When things were rocky for one of us we would simply remind each other that great things were on the horizon, and that it would not just be okay, but that it would be pretty amazing.  And guess what?  We were always right.  Every time.

Then came THE SECRET.  For those of you who have read it, you likely fall into one of three categories.  Either you a) think it’s complete bullshit, b) think it sounds like a good idea…theoretically, or c) read it and thought ‘obviously!’  Cousin A and I thought to ourselves ‘well, duh!  Obviously!’  For those of you who haven’t read it, the book (and the movie) contend that you manifest what you spend your time and energy thinking about.  Thus, if you’re constantly lamenting about being poor/fat/unhappy, than you will end up poor/fat/unhappy.  If you think and behave as though you are successful/wealthy/happy, than you will end up successful/wealthy/happy.  It’s not rocket science.  Basically you put out into the universe what you want your life to be and the universe gives it back to you.

Okay, so as I mentioned, Cousin A and I have been basically using THE SECRET since before we even knew THE SECRET (we’re very very smart).

But here’s the thing.

Sometimes I forget.

My girlfriend Ess and I talk about this a lot.  We fall into a funk where we feel like we can’t possibly work full-time, raise kids, keep the house in order, be good wives, get to the gym, see our friends, etc.  It.  Just.  Feels.  Like.  TOO.  MUCH.  We feel overwhelmed and overloaded and icky about everything.  When this happens to me I not only feel overwhelmed but it starts to spiral…I start to wonder if my bosses think I’m doing a good enough job and wonder if they might be thinking of firing me, I wonder what business I have raising children and if I’m a good Mom, I wonder why my husband likes me at all, and I feel like I suck in every aspect of my life.

Then something happens, I wake up one day and think to myself, ‘f*ck this.  What am I doing?!’  And typically I resolve that something is going to change.  I decide it and move on.  And guess what…something does change…every time.  And I remember that THE SECRET works.

Here’s the thing.  What if I not only tried harder to remember that THE SECRET ACTUALLY DOES WORK…because it does…but what if I also dreamed bigger.  Cousin A and I used to dream big.  No.  I mean BIG.  Somehow, by merely getting older, and suffering through the tragedies and sadness that you sometimes experience as you get older, I stopped dreaming so big and started to forget that THE SECRET works.  I understand that very sad things happen and that life ain’t easy, but that doesn’t negate the fact that amazing things can happen, IF and ONLY IF you believe they will happen.

So here we go…as I’ve been saying, this isn’t 2011, and it surely isn’t 2009 or 2010.  This, my dear friends, is 2012 and I don’t plan to be a passive bystander.  I’m on a role and that means…

TODAY:  What if I stopped forgetting that THE SECRET actually works and WHAT IF I remember how to dream really.  REALLY.  BIG?  This is a big one people…it’s time to remember that really fabulous things await us if we just believe it.


2 thoughts on “Our. Little. Secret.

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